5 Gentle Parenting Methods for Toddler Discipline

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toddler discipline

In this article, we will explore toddler discipline techniques in detail and discuss how they can be applied in a gentle parenting approach. As we know, disciplining a toddler is a challenging task that requires patience, understanding, and consistency, but it’s a massive responsibility to make sure that we raise children who are mindful and who know how to manage their emotions. Gentle parenting approaches emphasize the importance of positive reinforcement, clear communication, and redirection as effective ways of disciplining young children.

I know first hand that every child requires different approaches to discipline. Some are easier to discipline while others (like my little one) are a lot more determined in their ways.

These techniques are to be used as a guideline only and if you’re concerned that your child may have more serious behavioural concerns then I would recommend seeking professional help or intervention.

Gentle Toddler Discipline Techniques

Redirection

When it comes to toddler discipline, punishment is considered worst case scenario and something that we want to avoid.

This is where redirection comes in. It’s a technique that involves diverting a toddler’s attention from an undesirable behaviour to a more positive one.

For example, if a toddler is playing with a toy or object that is not suitable for their age, a parent can gently take it away and offer them a more age-appropriate toy to play with instead.

This approach helps the child understand that their behaviour is not acceptable, without punishing or scolding them.

When using redirection, it is important to remain calm and patient. Toddlers can easily sense when parents are agitated or frustrated and this can massively impact their response to you.

Toddlers are naturally curious and will explore their environment, even if it means doing something they shouldn’t.

Instead of getting frustrated or angry, parents should calmly and gently guide their child towards more appropriate behaviours.

By redirecting a toddler’s behaviour, parents can teach them what is acceptable and what is not, without resorting to punishment.

Praise

Praise is a powerful tool for reinforcing positive behaviours in toddlers.

Children thrive on positive attention, and when parents praise their child for doing something well, they are more likely to repeat that behaviour in the future.

Praise can be as simple as saying “good job” or “well done” when a toddler completes a task, such as putting their books away.

A good thing to note as well is that it helps to be specific when praising your toddler.

Instead of just saying “good job,” parents could be more specific about what the child did well. For example, “You did a great job putting your toys away all by yourself!”

Reflection

Reflection is a technique that involves helping toddlers understand the impact of their behaviour.

For example, if a toddler scratches or bites their sibling, a parent can help them understand how their sibling feels when they behave this way.

By empathizing with the sibling’s feelings, the child can begin to understand the impact of their actions.

When using reflection, it is essential to keep the conversation age-appropriate and simple.

Toddlers are still developing their understanding of emotions, and complex discussions may be confusing for them.

By keeping the conversation simple and straightforward, parents can help their child understand the impact of their actions without overwhelming them.

For the older toddlers you could consider creating a calm reflective corner in their room.

Fill it with calming activities such as books and colouring and give them a few minutes by themselves.

This is helpful especially where you have toddlers who revert to serious tantrums and need some time to calm down.

Shop Calming Toddler Activities

Clear Communication

Clear communication is critical when disciplining a toddler.

Toddlers are still learning how to communicate and understand language, and it is essential for parents to be clear and concise when communicating with them.

Parents should use simple language and short sentences when explaining the reason for a disciplinary action.

For example, if a toddler hits their sibling, a parent might say, “We don’t hit our siblings. Hitting hurts them, and it’s not nice. Let’s use our words instead.”

By using simple language and explaining the reason for the disciplinary action, parents can help their child understand why their behaviour is not acceptable.

It is also essential to use positive language when communicating with toddlers. Instead of saying, “Don’t do that,” parents should use positive language and explain what the child should do instead. For example, instead of saying, “Don’t hit” parents could say, “Let’s use our gentle hands when playing”.

Consistency

Consistency is crucial when disciplining toddlers.

Toddlers thrive on routine and predictability, and inconsistency can be confusing and frustrating for them.

Parents should establish clear expectations for behaviour and consistently enforce those expectations.

For example, if a parent establishes a rule that toys must be put away before dinner, they should consistently enforce that rule every day.

This helps toddlers understand what is expected of them and reduces confusion and frustration.

Consistency also means that parents should follow through on disciplinary actions.

If a parent warns their child that there will be consequences for a particular behaviour, they should follow through on that warning.

This helps toddlers understand that their actions have consequences and reinforces the importance of following rules and expectations.


In conclusion, disciplining a toddler can be a challenging task, but gentle parenting techniques such as redirection, praise, reflection, clear communication, and consistency can be effective ways of guiding their behaviour.

By remaining patient, empathetic, and consistent, parents can help their toddlers develop positive behaviours and avoid using punishment or scolding.

By using these techniques, parents can create a positive and nurturing environment for their toddlers to grow and thrive.

My husband and I have had a more difficult journey when it comes to disciplining our daughter and it’s and on going, ever changing journey.

The most important thing to consider, in my opinion, is that we need to show patience and understanding.

Toddlers are only little people who are trying to navigate their big emotions. Very often this is something that we still struggle with, well into our adult lives.

Be gentle with them, and be gentle with yourselves.